Birkbeck 0 – 5 ITV4

Match Report
Birkbeck 0 – 5 ITV4
Wednesday 29 September 2010, 1-2pm

After a positive result in the opening match of the season, Birkbeck came crashing back down to earth with a thump here, being outclassed by an altogether younger, fitter and more accomplished side.

Still, it could be argued that the scoreline was an unnecessarily harsh reflection of Birkbeck’s efforts throughout the match, and they were more than a match for their opponents during the opening exchanges. In fact, when ITV4 took the lead, it was in a more than fortuitous manner, when Scott Miller diverted a low cross into the top corner of his own net. It was, to be fair, an unstoppable shot – Birkbeck’s forwards, take note.

To their credit, Birkbeck came back into the match, with the midfield combination of Walters, Duffin and newcomer Krishna Tirbhowan fashioning some decent passing moves. Chances were few and far between, the best of which fell to Tirbhowan when he found himself through on goal, only to be foiled by the onrushing ‘keeper.

Things got even better for Birkbeck when ITV4’s dangerous and imposing centre-half with a reputation for scoring from long-range was nobbled by a (fair) challenge from Miller and forced to sit out the rest of the match. But just as Birkbeck were breathing a collective sigh of relief, ITV4 struck again on the stroke of half-time when a speculative shot from the edge of the box found its way into the corner of the net.

The general consensus at the interval was that things hadn’t gone too badly, but that coming back from 2-0 down was going to represent an uphill struggle. And so it proved, with goal number three arriving not long after the restart when the Birkbeck ‘keeper spilled a long-range shot, allowing the ITV4 attacker to finish from close range.

As Birkbeck pressed for an equaliser, the game became more open, allowing ITV4 to counter-attack. A fourth goal was added after an impressive cross was finished on the volley, while number five again arrived via the boot of Miller following a comical goalmouth scramble which saw the Birkbeck right-back slice an attempted goal-line clearance into his own net.

In the immediate aftermath of the final goal, ‘keeper Throup gracelessly enquired whether that was, indeed, his defensive colleague’s second own goal of the match, thus entitling him to share an unwanted record he had previously held alone. Thankfully, no other records (e.g. goals conceded in a single match) came under threat.

And that was pretty much that. A game to forget for all concerned, then, but possibly not as bad a performance as the scoreline suggests.

Don’t worry fellas, the next match is against MediaCom, who, er, should be no bother at all. Three points in the bag, I reckon.

(p.s. Don't check last season's results. Thanks)